The Pros & Cons of Nomad Houses: Coliving Conversations
Intrigued by the idea of coliving in beautiful destinations with other travelers like yourself? Read this first to see if a stay in a nomad house could be a good fit – or a headache waiting to happen.
Whether nomadic or sedentary, we Elder Millennials and Gen Xers are increasingly considering our coliving options. (No offense; “sedentary” is the term cultural anthropologists use for those who live in one place for a long time.)
For some, coliving conversations are ideological or values-based. Shared living spaces can reduce your carbon footprint and provide a more sustainable lifestyle, for example. Many others are considering coliving as a pathway to greater amenities and a higher standard of living than one could afford on their own.
Then, there’s the built-in sense of community. Ask any nomad, and they’ll tell you that frequent, prolonged travel isn’t all glamour, all the time. It can be intensely lonely, and finding community has been a hot topic at conferences and informal nomad gatherings for years now.
And let’s be honest — a lot of us just don’t have a choice.
The commodification of housing as an investment vehicle has been disastrous for the middle and working classes.
The demand for single-person housing has far outstripped supply in many regions, and major cities like Toronto, Barcelona, San Francisco, and Dublin have priced many working folks out of both the rental and ownership markets.
If you missed that magical moment in your twenties or early thirties when housing prices, mortgage rates, and your personal circumstances magically aligned, you might find yourself now locked out of homeownership for good.
(Or maybe, like me, you’ve already owned a house and lost it. Shit happens.)
Faced with the prospect of a life of rentals, many are realizing now what digital nomads already knew: if you have to rent, you might as well do it somewhere awesome. And since the pandemic, that’s become possible for an awful lot more people.
There are businesses like Outsite or Selina offering coliving experiences tailored to remote workers and digital nomads, with a built-in community and various living arrangements. I’ve spent time in both of these with mixed results. When it works, it can be fabulous. But when it doesn’t… well, get comfortable for a miserable month or two, or be prepared to relocate in a hurry.
As I’ve met people in the nomad world over the last several years, a new idea inevitably emerged:
Why don’t we just organize a shared home ourselves?
Enter Nomad Houses.
When I moved in with my first husband at 25, I realized that I had never really lived alone. My life up until then had been one coliving scenario after another: from roommates during college to staff housing all over Canada. I had spent over a decade living with other people in some capacity, and just sort of rolled into the next phase of living with a partner without really thinking about it.
Now, decades later, I find myself circling back to this model of shared living (with people other than my second husband and partner) — albeit in new ways.
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One of my more positive recent experiences was with a Canadian retiree who joined us in Nicaragua for a few months. He was laid-back, respectful, and we quickly found a rhythm — shared meals, had easygoing conversations, and had plenty of space when we needed it. It felt natural, like we were all in sync. A less positive experience involved a person with zero boundaries, who came in with a chip on their shoulder and eventually left with an even bigger one (and some of my belongings).
Trust is essential in coliving situations, and that was a hard lesson in the importance of choosing your housemates carefully and setting clear expectations upfront. If you get it right, a nomad house can be an affordable way to live like a local in any location and enjoy a built-in community of like minds.
Nomad Houses: The Pros
There are many different and highly personal reasons people choose coliving in a nomad house arrangement. It’s important to note here that for the purposes of this conversation, I’m talking primarily about temporary nomad houses, not permanent living situations.
We’re not talking about housing cooperatives, condos, timeshares, ownership through a corporation, etc. (although I have feelings – lots of them – there, too, and we’ll get to those in another post).
Right now, we’re talking about a group of people deciding to form a nomad house by renting a shared property in a destination they all want to visit for a month, a year, or more.
Here are just a few of the potential benefits:
Built-In Community: You get an instant social circle to help combat the loneliness many nomads experience. Being surrounded by like-minded people who share similar values can make it easier to forge friendships quickly (but you’re not always guaranteed this… more on that below).
Shared Resources and Amenities: Pooling resources means you may be able to afford a nomad house with higher-end amenities (fast Wi-Fi, coworking spaces, a gym or pool, etc.) that might be out of reach if you were renting on your own.
Lower Living Costs: Splitting rent, utilities, and even grocery staples means that living in a nomad house is often much cheaper than living alone. This makes it more affordable to live in desirable locations, even in expensive cities.
Flexibility: Nomad houses can come together as a short-term rental option, perfect for travelers who don’t want to be tied down by long leases. You can stay anywhere from a few weeks to several months, giving you flexibility and freedom.
Collaborative Work Environment: If you’re a remote worker, living with other nomads can boost productivity and build in a bit of accountability. You’re surrounded by people who understand the digital nomad lifestyle, making it easy to collaborate, exchange ideas, and even find freelance gigs or business partnerships.
Cultural Exchange: Living in a nomad house often means sharing space with people from different countries and backgrounds. This exposure to different cultures broadens your worldview and can lead to interesting conversations and learning opportunities.
Support System: Whether you need advice on a travel destination, help with work, or just someone to talk to, a nomad house provides a built-in support system. Housemates often look out for each other, creating a sense of family and security while on the road.
Opportunities for Adventure: Housemates often plan group outings, hikes, or weekend trips, making it easier to explore the area and experience local culture without the pressure of solo travel.
Networking: A nomad house can also be a great way to expand your professional network. You’ll likely meet people with diverse skills, from web developers to marketers to content creators, providing opportunities for collaboration or learning.
Shared Experiences and Skill Sharing: Living with a group of diverse individuals can open doors to learning new skills — whether it’s someone teaching you how to cook a new dish, offering travel tips, or sharing technical expertise like photography or coding.
Sounds idyllic, right? So why aren’t we all flitting around the world from one nomad house to the next?
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The Realities of Coliving: Dealing with Common Challenges in Nomad Houses
Nomad houses are not all shared swimming pools and group dinners. Based on my own experience and what I’ve learned from other nomads, here are some of the most common challenges people encounter in shared living situations:
1. Boundaries & Personal Space
Coliving can blur the lines between public and private life. People have different comfort levels when it comes to personal space, and what feels cozy to one person may feel invasive to another.
It’s essential to discuss boundaries and set ground rules before moving in together. “I’m sure we’ll work it out” sets the stage for misunderstandings, and no one wants to feel like they can’t retreat to their own space or enjoy shared living areas when they need it.
2. Cleanliness & Chores
Remember that awful feeling when your college roommate would leave dirty dishes in the sink for days? Well, that doesn’t always get better with age.
One of the biggest friction points in coliving is how to fairly divide household chores. If everyone’s on the same page, it can go smoothly, but when someone’s idea of “clean” differs, tensions rise.
3. Legal Responsibilities & Liability
This can get messy in a nomad house. Whose name is actually on the lease or rental agreement? How will you deal with issues involving the landlord or any of their staff, such as maintenance people or cleaners? What happens in the case of a dispute, unfulfilled services or promises, etc.?
Who has the authority to negotiate with the landlord? Who’s responsible for damages?
And the biggest issue of all – what happens if one resident has to end their stay early, either by choice or because they’ve violated house rules?
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I ended a resident’s stay in a nomad house when the disagreements and disrespect made coliving impossible. I felt I had become liable for someone else’s behaviour, and they refused to accept that they were putting me in a bad spot as leaseholder and change that behaviour. So I asked them to leave.
I got some flack for it… even though I’d given the person 3 weeks notice, a mutual friend said this is essentially a violation of the trust that needs to exist for coliving; that nomads deserve housing security, too.
And you know what… fair enough. I don’t disagree. So what’s the alternative – that one can do whatever they want and no amount of disrespect or damage warrants eviction, as housing is sacrosanct? I don’t think that works for anyone, either.
That experience taught me that all members of the household must share a crystal-clear understanding of the expectations and consequences of certain behaviours. I’d even go so far as to make sure we had established a Code of Conduct if I were in a nomad house again.
4. Trust & Security
Trust is a massive factor in shared living. You’re not just sharing walls and furniture; you’re sharing the intimate details of your everyday life. Knowing you can leave your laptop on the kitchen counter and that your life isn’t fodder for gossip is crucial for feeling at home.
Without clear communication, issues like someone helping themselves to your labeled groceries, or failing to recognize when you need some quiet downtime can quickly build resentment. It may seem minor, but repeatedly crossing these lines undermines respect and creates tension.
One of the most delicate areas of trust and security revolves around sex and dating, which can create complicated dynamics as personal lives are intertwined with shared spaces. Navigating these waters requires clear boundaries, mutual respect, and a heightened awareness of how personal relationships affect the entire household. If you’re not willing to compromise and need things your way – whether that means being allowed to bring around anyone you want anytime, or not having to deal with other people’s dates at all – a nomad house may not be for you.
Clear agreements and mutual respect around belongings can prevent a lot of headaches down the road, too. More on that below.
5. Different Schedules & Lifestyles
In a coliving situation, everyone’s life rhythm is different. Some people are early risers, others are night owls. Add in differing work schedules, and you can see how this might get complicated.
In one coliving setup, my roommate didn’t mention her vegan diet until we moved in together, at which point I was notified I wasn’t allowed to store or consume meat in our home, either. (That roommate also liked to do yoga in her underwear when I had company. She was a trip. 😬)
Finding the right balance in a nomad house takes patience and compromise. But this is also where you need an extensive and brutally honest interview process before committing to living together. If there are deal-breakers about how others behave in your shared spaces, get that on the table and decide whether it’s really a good fit.
Make sure you discuss working hours, where people will take calls and meetings, what hobbies people will be practicing in shared spaces and at what hours, who’s having company over and when, etc.
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6. Emotional Labor
Living closely with others can blur the line between friendship and housemate relationships, and navigating these waters requires a lot of emotional intelligence.
From managing conflicts to supporting one another, coliving can naturally lead to deeper emotional exchanges. This can be a beautiful thing, but it can also become exhausting if one person takes on more emotional labor than they signed up for. Similarly, it tends to suck the air out of the room if a resident wants or needs emotional energy more often than others have it to give.
Establishing regular checkpoints to discuss how the house logistics and coliving relationships are working can help. These periodic house meetings allow housemates to safely voice concerns, celebrate wins, and check in emotionally. This helps prevent resentment from building up and allows everyone to share the emotional load in a more organized, intentional way.
As you go about your daily life in the house, you’re bound to run into annoyances. Before raising an issue, ask yourself: What do I expect of my housemates if I share this? Am I venting or looking for help finding a solution? Is this the right time to bring this up?
Not every conflict or personal issue needs to be shared with the group, and housemates should feel empowered to set limits on how much emotional energy they can give.
Learn to recognize when it’s time to say no, too. It’s okay to protect your emotional boundaries and let a housemate know when you’re not in the right space to take on their concerns.
7. Rent & Financial Agreements
Money can get tricky when you’re sharing living space, especially if expectations aren’t clear. Whether it’s a temporary stay or a longer-term arrangement, having a financial agreement in place is critical. Remember, too, that rent is one thing, but a lot of financial ambiguity can come up in day-to-day life as you live together.
Are all private spaces the same? If rooms differ significantly in size, features, or privacy, agree on a fair distribution of rent based on those factors. For example, a housemate with a larger room or private bathroom might pay slightly more to reflect the added value.
Are utilities shared equally? How will you divvy up the costs of shared meals, household cleaning supplies, even toilet paper? An app like Splitwise can help here, and all members of the household have to be committed to respecting other residents’ property and belongings.
Will people pay less if they arrive late or depart earlier than the full term of the rental. Getting into day rates can be messy and leave someone else on the hook for any shortages in the calculations.
What happens when someone doesn’t pay their share on time? Discuss in advance what will happen if someone can't meet their financial obligations—whether it’s giving them extra time, finding a replacement housemate, or temporarily covering their share. Having a clear plan will reduce the stress of scrambling to cover costs when issues arise.
Is a Nomad House Right for You?
For many of us in midlife, coliving is a compelling option. It can foster deeper human connections, provide financial relief, and reduce the environmental impact of living alone. But it’s not a one-size-fits-all solution. If you’re thinking of diving into the world of coliving, here are a few questions to ask yourself:
Can I live with less privacy? If you cherish your solitude, shared living might not be the right choice—or you may need to find a setup that prioritizes private spaces.
What do I want to get out of it?
Whether it’s building community, saving money, or having more adventure, be clear about your motivations. This can help you find the right fit and avoid disappointment.Am I comfortable managing group dynamics? Coliving means balancing different personalities, schedules, and needs. If you’re stuck in your ways, prone to frustration with group living, or find conflict resolution difficult, coliving might require more patience than you’re ready for.
Can I balance work and social life in a shared space? If you’re a remote worker, you’ll need to make sure the nomad house offers a conducive environment for productivity. Shared spaces can be lively, and you may need to create boundaries to focus on work.
How adaptable am I to different living standards? In some nomad houses, private amenities may be limited, or the space might be more communal than you’re used to. Standards of living also vary wildly from region to region. If you need all of your creature comforts and would feel lost without them, this may not be for you.
The biggest question for a lot of us seems to be: Can we even find opportunities to live this way? Nomad houses pop up from time to time among the people I know, but you may have to take the bull by the horns and create one yourself if you’re having trouble finding a nomad house to try out.
Having learned my fair share of lessons — both good and bad — I’m always happy to chat with anyone considering this path. As always, full subscribers can join the conversation and comment below!
P.S. An interesting trend I’m noticing among friends is a desire to not necessarily co-live under one roof, but co-locate in our own accommodations in the same destination. That’s a whole other post… stay tuned 😉
Another great one Miranda! Hope to see you soon.